Post by The Mouth on Jul 19, 2014 17:00:23 GMT -8
3rd March, 2014
Limerick, Ireland
I screamed as I thew the flask across the room, the Beast thick and choking in my rage. Months! Months! And I couldn’t get the dosage or the metabolization right.
My rats were just not performing as I had hoped. I was starting to develop new ideas about my failure; ideas like my will could be expressed directly on the world and before I wanted to kill so many in a holocaust of fire and death to prove that I was worthy of respect and fear. They would know my name, and they would tremble.
Now I wanted to be forgotten; to raise my grandaughters for a few more years, to have that life that I was denied…
I wanted to fail and fueled by my blood and distracted focus, my previous triple verified process was breaking down.
I calm myself, shakily. I’m so messed up. Angry about Katherine, angry about my poor decisions, guilty about the murders, proud of who I murdered, worry for the girls… I have no focus. Not until I’m in the soup and then I’m too sharp, I do things that I regret but chose to out of necessity; that’s combat. A sort of anti-frenzy.
I read my notes again. And again, retracing my steps.
“Alright Grandfather, what gives?”
I nearly jump out of my skin, the Beast howls in fear and I almost go through a ventilation window.
Hannah is on the steps to the basement, eating a carrot.
“Christ in heaven, child. Don’t do that…” Hannah has gotten amazingly stealthy lately.
“Sneak up on you? Pfft. Don’t make it so easy. So, why the screaming and breaking and spraying… Did you liquify some rats?”
Hannah is also amazingly sensitive about smaller animals.
“I might have done?”
Her eyes flash to wolfish gold. “Grandfather.”
“Allright. I’m to poison crazy powerful old Vampires so they are easier to fight. But I can’t get the feckin’ poison to work right!”
“Heh. You said Feck.”
“Or for… I did. I’ve been in Ireland way too fecking- Fucking long. Damnit.”
“So. You need to poison them.”
“... Yes.”
“And your science isn’t working.”
Sigh. “No.”
“Okay. Give me the drugs.”
Normally when a teenager says ‘give me the drugs’ a process of bad decisions is started.
“Uh. No?”
“I’m not going to do them Grandfather, I’m going to magic them. And you can’t see me or anyone else do it. You might, as you remind us, get ideas.” Hannah takes my items and wanders back up the stairs.
“It is an interesting thing you with them my apprentice.”
I nearly jump out of my skin again. I whirl and see Selim sitting on my bed.
Oh shit. He wasn’t supposed to know, he might…
“Bah. I know you are breaking the precious Masquerade. A century ago I would have done something about it. Two and I would have celebrated your small act of rebellion.”
“It isn’t that bloody small, Master. And I think I got magic’d into it.” I learned, about ten minutes into knowing Selim, that being honest was a wise path. “Regardless, I know if anyone found out I would be… It would be unfortunate.”
“Yes. It would. And yes, you have been magic’d as you say. Just not quite the way you think.”
I tilt my head at him. “Oh?”
“Oh, you are under a spell, true. I can see it, hovering about you. But you also like them as humans, not as tools. You empathize with them, you believe many of the same things, and want the best for them and to succeed.” His grin flashes in his teak face.
“I… See.”
He laughs outright. “You do not, apprentice. I know you did not join the Anarchs because you think the tyranny of the elders is destroying Kindred, nor do you believe the ancients shall rise or that we can fight them effectively without more data on their capabilities. You believe that the shortest path to power was through the Anarchs, that you get attract allies and friends, that they would value you, and that you could build a Kingdom and spread your ideas.”
He always did know me better than I knew myself. “Then… Why?”
“Because Francis, you are my rebellion. I am old, yes. But far from ancient. I was a terror in my youth, passing judgement on my kind; dealing death where it was called for, and it was called for much of the time. I saw that you had reached that plateau of enlightenment and now you move past it.” He lies back in my bed and contemplates my ceiling. I can hear the girls moving around the kitchen, cooking.
“You have achieved a new plateau with these children. You have found your heart; and I hope for you to see that there will be justice required in our world. That you will be an agent of that justice, and that you will build respect for that justice. It is a hard thing to have ethics as a Kindred.”
“Master, you speak like Cardae.”
“Ah, a fellow traveler, on a different road. She seeks enlightenment. I merely seek to guard the way. Apprentice; I know your secrets. I know your heart. And I know that you will end Yuria’s madness. For if she cannot control her environment she will burn it to rebuild anew. And she has done such things to mortals and kindred alike in her boredom. Justice says you will bring her downfall.”
“But you won’t help me.”
The grin goes wide. “Of course not.”
“Because I need to sort this out on my own…”
He is in front of me in a flash, a dagger pressed against my eye, and reflexively move backward but the pressure remains constant and feather light.
“No, my apprentice. I need them to fear you. I need the Baron to fear you just enough…”
The knife goes away.
“A neonate, just a year dead, doing this? The Ventrue will curse your name and praise you just the same. They will comfort themselves with the idea that I was training and supervising you. At their soirees in a year they will all lay it down at my feet. But they will know, Francis Casterly, they will know that you did this. And they will fear you.”
His forehead touches my own, and I am still with fear. Selim is in a mood.
“And they will ask, shall he come to my domain next, this childe? He appears across the world in days, destroys and creates chaos in minutes. But he only goes after the deserving. Then they will ask, do I deserve a visit from Francis?”
He laughs.
“And the answer will always be ‘Yes’.”
Interlude: Selim
By Ben Vaughan
Limerick, Ireland
I screamed as I thew the flask across the room, the Beast thick and choking in my rage. Months! Months! And I couldn’t get the dosage or the metabolization right.
My rats were just not performing as I had hoped. I was starting to develop new ideas about my failure; ideas like my will could be expressed directly on the world and before I wanted to kill so many in a holocaust of fire and death to prove that I was worthy of respect and fear. They would know my name, and they would tremble.
Now I wanted to be forgotten; to raise my grandaughters for a few more years, to have that life that I was denied…
I wanted to fail and fueled by my blood and distracted focus, my previous triple verified process was breaking down.
I calm myself, shakily. I’m so messed up. Angry about Katherine, angry about my poor decisions, guilty about the murders, proud of who I murdered, worry for the girls… I have no focus. Not until I’m in the soup and then I’m too sharp, I do things that I regret but chose to out of necessity; that’s combat. A sort of anti-frenzy.
I read my notes again. And again, retracing my steps.
“Alright Grandfather, what gives?”
I nearly jump out of my skin, the Beast howls in fear and I almost go through a ventilation window.
Hannah is on the steps to the basement, eating a carrot.
“Christ in heaven, child. Don’t do that…” Hannah has gotten amazingly stealthy lately.
“Sneak up on you? Pfft. Don’t make it so easy. So, why the screaming and breaking and spraying… Did you liquify some rats?”
Hannah is also amazingly sensitive about smaller animals.
“I might have done?”
Her eyes flash to wolfish gold. “Grandfather.”
“Allright. I’m to poison crazy powerful old Vampires so they are easier to fight. But I can’t get the feckin’ poison to work right!”
“Heh. You said Feck.”
“Or for… I did. I’ve been in Ireland way too fecking- Fucking long. Damnit.”
“So. You need to poison them.”
“... Yes.”
“And your science isn’t working.”
Sigh. “No.”
“Okay. Give me the drugs.”
Normally when a teenager says ‘give me the drugs’ a process of bad decisions is started.
“Uh. No?”
“I’m not going to do them Grandfather, I’m going to magic them. And you can’t see me or anyone else do it. You might, as you remind us, get ideas.” Hannah takes my items and wanders back up the stairs.
“It is an interesting thing you with them my apprentice.”
I nearly jump out of my skin again. I whirl and see Selim sitting on my bed.
Oh shit. He wasn’t supposed to know, he might…
“Bah. I know you are breaking the precious Masquerade. A century ago I would have done something about it. Two and I would have celebrated your small act of rebellion.”
“It isn’t that bloody small, Master. And I think I got magic’d into it.” I learned, about ten minutes into knowing Selim, that being honest was a wise path. “Regardless, I know if anyone found out I would be… It would be unfortunate.”
“Yes. It would. And yes, you have been magic’d as you say. Just not quite the way you think.”
I tilt my head at him. “Oh?”
“Oh, you are under a spell, true. I can see it, hovering about you. But you also like them as humans, not as tools. You empathize with them, you believe many of the same things, and want the best for them and to succeed.” His grin flashes in his teak face.
“I… See.”
He laughs outright. “You do not, apprentice. I know you did not join the Anarchs because you think the tyranny of the elders is destroying Kindred, nor do you believe the ancients shall rise or that we can fight them effectively without more data on their capabilities. You believe that the shortest path to power was through the Anarchs, that you get attract allies and friends, that they would value you, and that you could build a Kingdom and spread your ideas.”
He always did know me better than I knew myself. “Then… Why?”
“Because Francis, you are my rebellion. I am old, yes. But far from ancient. I was a terror in my youth, passing judgement on my kind; dealing death where it was called for, and it was called for much of the time. I saw that you had reached that plateau of enlightenment and now you move past it.” He lies back in my bed and contemplates my ceiling. I can hear the girls moving around the kitchen, cooking.
“You have achieved a new plateau with these children. You have found your heart; and I hope for you to see that there will be justice required in our world. That you will be an agent of that justice, and that you will build respect for that justice. It is a hard thing to have ethics as a Kindred.”
“Master, you speak like Cardae.”
“Ah, a fellow traveler, on a different road. She seeks enlightenment. I merely seek to guard the way. Apprentice; I know your secrets. I know your heart. And I know that you will end Yuria’s madness. For if she cannot control her environment she will burn it to rebuild anew. And she has done such things to mortals and kindred alike in her boredom. Justice says you will bring her downfall.”
“But you won’t help me.”
The grin goes wide. “Of course not.”
“Because I need to sort this out on my own…”
He is in front of me in a flash, a dagger pressed against my eye, and reflexively move backward but the pressure remains constant and feather light.
“No, my apprentice. I need them to fear you. I need the Baron to fear you just enough…”
The knife goes away.
“A neonate, just a year dead, doing this? The Ventrue will curse your name and praise you just the same. They will comfort themselves with the idea that I was training and supervising you. At their soirees in a year they will all lay it down at my feet. But they will know, Francis Casterly, they will know that you did this. And they will fear you.”
His forehead touches my own, and I am still with fear. Selim is in a mood.
“And they will ask, shall he come to my domain next, this childe? He appears across the world in days, destroys and creates chaos in minutes. But he only goes after the deserving. Then they will ask, do I deserve a visit from Francis?”
He laughs.
“And the answer will always be ‘Yes’.”
Interlude: Selim
By Ben Vaughan