Post by Sheila Cooper on Dec 19, 2010 5:16:26 GMT -8
Personal Log, Sheila Cooper, Knight of House Dougal. Sunday, December 19, 4:47 am.
Number of days since leaving Las Vegas: 26. Number of times I've been rained on in those 26 days... it doesn't matter anymore.
It was snowing on the way home. The flakes melted as soon as they touched the car and the street, but there were still white crystals floating through the air. We might have a white Christmas. I just can't hate the weather here anymore.
This town is definitely growing on me. Besides Mat and Nissa (who I already adore), Helen is definitely growing on me, Baroness Nemitz continues to be wonderful, and I'm even finding myself liking the Count more than I expected. The boggan, Vincent, is way more interesting than any boggan I've ever met, I'm looking forward to that date with Rene, and generally... the people here are pretty fucking cool.
Caleb grabbed me aside though, and asked a bunch of questions about Mat. Ugh. I get why he's planning for "just in case," but he's being way fucking paranoid. Not to mention Mat getting on my case about maybe giving shit away. Uhhh, no? Oath or no oath, I'm not going to do that, idiot. I hope I was vague enough to be helpful without being too precise. I want Caleb to stop having these issues with Mat, but I can't entirely trust someone who thinks my lover is crazy to not try to fuck him over--whether or not I trust the guy otherwise. Which I do, for whatever reason.
I've been doing a lot of work lately, and that's good, and it's been challenging and fun, and distracting from the drama. I also have a new job--I'm the county Scribe. And also Acting Herald, until Rhiannon is back at court again anyhow. Scribe will be terrific, though, something I can do well and an excuse to get involved in things more! Which is half the point. And it's also something that needs doing, so... there you go.
Nissa's convinced me to get a job as a waitress, which will be awesome. Waitress job at a nightclub... all I'll have to do is show up to get a decent amount of tips. I've been practicing my personability too so I'll be pleasant and friendly and sexy and well... mortal guys usually think with their dicks. Fae guys too. Money to be had! And a little mortal involvement too.
Speaking of jobs... well, sort of... Ulrim is annoying the hell out of me. No, no, I'll be honest. He's pissing me off. His attitude sucks. First he pokes his nose into my business, and tonight he tried telling Mat to talk about a private conversation with the Count, because, he claimed, Mat is "his Knight." Uhhh, no. Beyond Mat not actually being "his" Knight, there's the matter of it being a personal conversation, with the Count, and therefore none of his fucking business. Moreover, giving such strong commands on something so fucking mundane is just ridiculous.
There's a line, you know? A line where you respect privacy, where you trust the judgment of those working for you, where you realize they aren't your slaves or your servants. I prefer to think of it as employees rather than vassals--vassal implies oaths neither Mat nor I have sworn--but even a vassal (or a servant!) deserves a level of respect and autonomy. Pulling rank to find out the details of a simple conversation smacks of abusing power.
I think he's either insecure or way overconfident. He's downright rude to his Knights, he doesn't trust either of us to know what the fuck we're doing--or at least he doesn't act like it--and he seems to think he alone can protect the freehold... or that's what I'm gathering. I'll have to confirm what the living hell he meant with all of that. Still, he's being erratic and rude and... augh. I'm just frustrated, and very close to being quite done. I can work with people. I can listen to orders. I will respect and trust my superiors. But I expect a certain level of respect and trust in kind. Ugh.
Okay, I've vented, and I'm going to try not to dwell. Try really, really hard. Yule's coming, and Mat's taking care of dinner (we'll see how that turns out)... I have clubbing to do with Helen and a new job soon, a new position at court, a lot to make, and oh... there's that pesky war going on outside. I'll do something about the other bit but I can't dwell too long. Much too much to do.
It's late. I'd better get some sleep, assuming the chimera will shut the hell up and let us. Need to find a way to keep the fuckers out. In the meantime... I'm too tired to be witty.
End log
Number of days since leaving Las Vegas: 26. Number of times I've been rained on in those 26 days... it doesn't matter anymore.
It was snowing on the way home. The flakes melted as soon as they touched the car and the street, but there were still white crystals floating through the air. We might have a white Christmas. I just can't hate the weather here anymore.
This town is definitely growing on me. Besides Mat and Nissa (who I already adore), Helen is definitely growing on me, Baroness Nemitz continues to be wonderful, and I'm even finding myself liking the Count more than I expected. The boggan, Vincent, is way more interesting than any boggan I've ever met, I'm looking forward to that date with Rene, and generally... the people here are pretty fucking cool.
Caleb grabbed me aside though, and asked a bunch of questions about Mat. Ugh. I get why he's planning for "just in case," but he's being way fucking paranoid. Not to mention Mat getting on my case about maybe giving shit away. Uhhh, no? Oath or no oath, I'm not going to do that, idiot. I hope I was vague enough to be helpful without being too precise. I want Caleb to stop having these issues with Mat, but I can't entirely trust someone who thinks my lover is crazy to not try to fuck him over--whether or not I trust the guy otherwise. Which I do, for whatever reason.
I've been doing a lot of work lately, and that's good, and it's been challenging and fun, and distracting from the drama. I also have a new job--I'm the county Scribe. And also Acting Herald, until Rhiannon is back at court again anyhow. Scribe will be terrific, though, something I can do well and an excuse to get involved in things more! Which is half the point. And it's also something that needs doing, so... there you go.
Nissa's convinced me to get a job as a waitress, which will be awesome. Waitress job at a nightclub... all I'll have to do is show up to get a decent amount of tips. I've been practicing my personability too so I'll be pleasant and friendly and sexy and well... mortal guys usually think with their dicks. Fae guys too. Money to be had! And a little mortal involvement too.
Speaking of jobs... well, sort of... Ulrim is annoying the hell out of me. No, no, I'll be honest. He's pissing me off. His attitude sucks. First he pokes his nose into my business, and tonight he tried telling Mat to talk about a private conversation with the Count, because, he claimed, Mat is "his Knight." Uhhh, no. Beyond Mat not actually being "his" Knight, there's the matter of it being a personal conversation, with the Count, and therefore none of his fucking business. Moreover, giving such strong commands on something so fucking mundane is just ridiculous.
There's a line, you know? A line where you respect privacy, where you trust the judgment of those working for you, where you realize they aren't your slaves or your servants. I prefer to think of it as employees rather than vassals--vassal implies oaths neither Mat nor I have sworn--but even a vassal (or a servant!) deserves a level of respect and autonomy. Pulling rank to find out the details of a simple conversation smacks of abusing power.
I think he's either insecure or way overconfident. He's downright rude to his Knights, he doesn't trust either of us to know what the fuck we're doing--or at least he doesn't act like it--and he seems to think he alone can protect the freehold... or that's what I'm gathering. I'll have to confirm what the living hell he meant with all of that. Still, he's being erratic and rude and... augh. I'm just frustrated, and very close to being quite done. I can work with people. I can listen to orders. I will respect and trust my superiors. But I expect a certain level of respect and trust in kind. Ugh.
Okay, I've vented, and I'm going to try not to dwell. Try really, really hard. Yule's coming, and Mat's taking care of dinner (we'll see how that turns out)... I have clubbing to do with Helen and a new job soon, a new position at court, a lot to make, and oh... there's that pesky war going on outside. I'll do something about the other bit but I can't dwell too long. Much too much to do.
It's late. I'd better get some sleep, assuming the chimera will shut the hell up and let us. Need to find a way to keep the fuckers out. In the meantime... I'm too tired to be witty.
End log