Post by Moira ap Eiluned on Apr 30, 2013 13:33:52 GMT -8
Frustrated, Moira shoved the keyboard away from her and sunk back into her chair, glowering into space. She’d spent the last hour staring at the same section of code, and she still couldn’t stay focused on it. Her mind was spinning, twisting, spiraling inside a skull that somehow seemed much too empty right now.
She’d never wanted to become ITs spy in the Bright Lands, the World Above. She never asked to have a bit of IT crawl inside her head. But now that it was gone she realized that it left an odd sort of emptiness behind. For a while, Hans’ absence hadn’t been so bad. IT had been inside her, tending her; it kept the Bedlam at bay, and diffused the most harmful of the Dreaming’s Nightmares. IT had granted her breath under water, and spared her from the crushing weight of the depths. IT had, in its way, cared for her, as a good noble tended a valued vassal.
On some very deep level, she’d known what IT was. It had taken all her secrets from her, all but the one she could not afford to let loose, the one that would be most dire to have learned. That, somehow, she had managed to conceal from IT, though all else was stripped and laid bare before IT.
And if not for Patches, that strange and wonderful Marauder, she would be bound to IT still. She didn’t know why she had been chosen for salvation; indeed, she didn’t think she had. It was the Realm that had been saved, saved from her and what she had carried inside her.
Malachai – Jack – was obviously worried about her, doing his level best to help care for her, but in all truth she hardly knew what she herself needed. She knew what she wanted – she wanted Hans here, to talk to, to hold, to listen with that quiet faith that gave her faith in herself, but that Hans was gone. Without him….
Moira tried again to focus on the lines of code, forcing herself into the tedious work before her, trying hard not to think about Hans, or the quiet emptiness, or the call she’d just gotten from Duke Guile a few minutes ago and what it meant.
She didn’t want to think about what would happen to her, or the Realm, when the ancient and godlike Fomorian who had set ITs mark upon her came looking for ITs errant tool….
She’d never wanted to become ITs spy in the Bright Lands, the World Above. She never asked to have a bit of IT crawl inside her head. But now that it was gone she realized that it left an odd sort of emptiness behind. For a while, Hans’ absence hadn’t been so bad. IT had been inside her, tending her; it kept the Bedlam at bay, and diffused the most harmful of the Dreaming’s Nightmares. IT had granted her breath under water, and spared her from the crushing weight of the depths. IT had, in its way, cared for her, as a good noble tended a valued vassal.
On some very deep level, she’d known what IT was. It had taken all her secrets from her, all but the one she could not afford to let loose, the one that would be most dire to have learned. That, somehow, she had managed to conceal from IT, though all else was stripped and laid bare before IT.
And if not for Patches, that strange and wonderful Marauder, she would be bound to IT still. She didn’t know why she had been chosen for salvation; indeed, she didn’t think she had. It was the Realm that had been saved, saved from her and what she had carried inside her.
Malachai – Jack – was obviously worried about her, doing his level best to help care for her, but in all truth she hardly knew what she herself needed. She knew what she wanted – she wanted Hans here, to talk to, to hold, to listen with that quiet faith that gave her faith in herself, but that Hans was gone. Without him….
Moira tried again to focus on the lines of code, forcing herself into the tedious work before her, trying hard not to think about Hans, or the quiet emptiness, or the call she’d just gotten from Duke Guile a few minutes ago and what it meant.
She didn’t want to think about what would happen to her, or the Realm, when the ancient and godlike Fomorian who had set ITs mark upon her came looking for ITs errant tool….